Seriously, what kind of name is that?

Dude, it’s a nickname.*

This dog was full-on feral** when we found him.  He wasn’t aggressive or anything; he just had no use at all for people or for any of the things that people make dogs do. He acted like a pissed-off teenager (and still does!) when we made him do anything unpleasant or inconvenient. Since he was used to having no rules at all, everything was unpleasant or inconvenient.

Our other dogs may sulk for a minute or so when we make them stop (insert fun thing that wasn’t hurting anybody, like racing around the house at top speed and knocking over every single lamp on the first floor, here), but HYF’s resentment at every little thing that doesn’t go his way is truly epic.

Even for something small like “sit”, this mutt can keep a hate on for hours. Again, he doesn’t get aggressive — instead, he’ll glare at us as he walks out of the room to his Safe Spot, sulk in there for five or ten minutes, come out and make sure we see him, stare us down as he stomps out once more, shampoo, rinse, repeat, until it’s time for bed or dinner, whichever comes first.

If we’ve done something truly horrible like clipped his nails, even food doesn’t get a response; he’ll be too busy licking at his paws and then stomping around us to make sure we can hear how his nails don’t make a good strong clack like they used to.

Bath time? Come here? Don’t pee on that? STOP PEEING I SAID!? He hates us forever for all of these things and more.

Recently, we’ve noticed that “forever” takes a little less time each week. When it’s down to a five- or even ten-minute window, maybe we’ll change his nickname to See, That Wasn’t So Bad. Honestly, though? He’ll always be Hate You Forever to me.

Don’t fret: in my head, the in Hate is a little heart.

Where are all the other questions?

That is the only question we ever get.

If you have one, please post it in the comments. We’ll answer you, and may even move it into the FAQ just so things won’t seem so empty up here.

*I’m sure this doesn’t apply to you, because I’m sure you’re a reasonable person — but we’d like to officially request that anyone planning to comment about what horrible people we are for calling our dog that please just simmer down. It’s just a fun thing we like to call him. Yes, it is fun rather than mean.

Yes, it is.

**I know, I know: in one of the early posts here, I called him half-feral. That was what I thought for a whole 24 hours or so after we found him. I was naive and so very, very wrong.

It took three months for Hate You Forever to work up to half-feral. Until then? Wild. Dog.

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